Emma Danzey :: An Interview with a Single Woman Making a Difference

It’s day ten of 31 Days of Interviews with Single Women. You can find a list of all the interviews in this post.

I’m so happy to introduce you to Emma Danzey! Emma says:

I tell my friends that a lot of times people say, “when you are content, then God will give you a boyfriend.” This is very false. Women do not “earn” boyfriends because they are content and supposedly do not want them. Women enter relationships because it is time for them to minister to others no longer as a single. I have a constant inner peace/contentment because of Jesus, but sometimes my emotions can be sad, frustrated, or lonely. Contentment does not mean that you do not desire a relationship; it is knowing that you do not need one, all you need is Jesus.

Emma a 21-year-old senior at Liberty University studying Music & Worship with a specialization in Artistry. God called her into a Christian Music Career/Ministry in 2012, she recorded her first EP in 2013. Since this God has opened up many opportunities, and she is currently working on her next EP. Emma is also starting the Polished Conference for teen girls grades 6-12 that kicks off this November.

Brenda: First, tell us a little about yourself – your name, age, where you live, and where you grew up.

Emma: My name is Emma Danzey. I am 21 and am currently living in Lynchburg, VA. My hometown is Hickory, North Carolina.

Brenda: Where do you work, and how did you get started in your job?

Emma: I am a senior at Liberty University studying Music & Worship with a specialization in Artistry, but I am also on the journey of being a Christian Artist. November 2012 the Lord called me to follow Him into a Christian Music Career/Ministry. He kept affirming it through my family, convocation speakers, and finally in our time alone I read Ephesians 3:20-21 and took the first step in obedience. I got into the Artist program at my school that month, began writing songs more seriously in January 2013, and recorded my first EP, Deep Within, with Cody Norris and Award-winning producer, Ed Cash in July 2013. From there it has just been one amazing opportunity after another to serve God and point others towards Him doing what I love to do!

Brenda: Do you feel like your job is God’s calling on your life or do you hope it leads to something else one day?

Emma: Yes, 100%! My career is one that is not common and sometimes seems unstable, but the Lord called me to it, and I am trusting and following Him.

Brenda: When you envisioned your life as a young girl, did you hope to have a career when you grew up or was your desire more for marriage and children or did you want both for your life?

Emma: I have always been someone who desired both a career and a family. Ever since I was a little girl playing with Barbies and dolls, I knew that I wanted to be a wife and a mom. On the other hand, I also knew I wanted to have a career in something; it just took a few years until I knew what that was.

Brenda: What fires you up? What are you most passionate about in your life and in the world?

Emma: I get fired up about people knowing Jesus! He is the reason that I have hope and I want others to have that as well. Specifically, I am praying that young women will follow Jesus, seek Him daily, and allow Him to do immeasurably more through their lives. The world is a place that day after day seems to be lowering the value of women. The sad thing is, that we are helping in this process by the way we dress, how we speak, and how we live. I want women of all ages to respect themselves, so that others will respect them as well.

Brenda: Are you involved in serving in your community or church? What, if any, ministries or organizations are you a part of?

Emma: Yes, I serve on the worship team at Corinth Reformed Church in Hickory, North Carolina when I am home. It is so important to be plugged into the local body of believers. I am also starting the Polished Conference for teen girls grades 6-12 that kicks off this November 7-8. Feel free to check it out on Facebook.

Brenda: Tell us one thing you LOVE about being single and one thing you hate (or your biggest struggle) about being single.

Emma: I LOVE being able to have full focus on Jesus and His calling for my life. He will always be number one, but one day my spouse will also be another focus. I also love being able to just hang out with my girl friends and share in this sweet season together!

One thing I “hate” about being single is definitely the loneliness factor. I have the desire to be married one day, and would love to be in a relationship with a godly man. It is very difficult when you have waited a long time to date and God has not brought the right man yet. I trust Him though, and I would not be where I am today if He did not BLESS me with singleness.

Brenda: I imagine there are times when you feel content in your singleness and other times when you want to throw something across the room because of it, but overall, how do you feel about being a single woman? Is there more contentment and peace or more of the opposite?

Emma: This is a difficult question because emotions change daily. I tell my friends that a lot of times people say, “when you are content, then God will give you a boyfriend.” This is very false. Women do not “earn” boyfriends because they are content and supposedly do not want them. Women enter relationships because it is time for them to minister to others no longer as a single. I have a constant inner peace/contentment because of Jesus, but sometimes my emotions can be sad, frustrated, or lonely. Contentment does not mean that you do not desire a relationship; it is knowing that you do not need one, all you need is Jesus.

Brenda: Do you ever get mad at God because you are single? When bitterness, discontentment, confusion, and even jealousy creep into your mind, how to you deal with it? Do you have a go-to person or scripture verse or something else that helps?

Emma: Yes. These are those natural emotions I mentioned in question 8. I tell God how I am feeling and sometimes write out prayers. The Lord hears our cries (Psalm 34:17) and He holds our tears in a bottle. (Psalm 56:8) I spend time in the Word and I remind myself of verses such as: Isaiah 55:8 “”For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD.” I also believe that talking to others can be a great encouragement. We should always go to the Lord first, but I have a few friends my age and mentors that are older than me that I can share my burdens with and have pray for me.

Brenda: How do you deal with loneliness?

Emma: I remind myself that it is natural and I seek God through His Word, worship music, and prayer.

Brenda: Do you struggle with obsessing about guys and dating? Like, if you’re interested in a guy or if you just start dating someone new, do you think about him constantly, analyze every conversation, and get overly attached quickly? Is so (or if not) how do you deal with your emotions?

Emma: Sadly, I am guilty of this. I think the longer you wait, the more hopeful and excited you get. It is good to be positive, but I have to be careful not to be planning my future out in my head before the guy has even verbalized his interest. I have to constantly check on my heart and guard it above all things (Proverbs 4:23), including emotions/over analyzing.

Brenda: What is your biggest pet peeve about the way single women are perceived?

Emma: I do not like that people perceive us as weird, too picky, or prudes. I am a woman seeking God’s heart and I desire a man whom I am attracted to that can lead me spiritually. I should not have to settle. The Lord knows my heart and what I hope for in a husband, and I am wired the way and am on the path that I am on for a reason. His timing is the best timing.

Brenda: Do you struggle with finding community in your local church? How do you find community in a world that seems coupled up?

Emma: Sometimes. I have experienced this a little, but since I am still in college, there are a lot of programs and groups to be involved in. I have friends that are single and friends that are coupled up. I just am myself and spend time with people regardless of if they are in relationships or not. I would definitely say that it is important to hang out with those of the same sex, because when you are married, it is inappropriate to hang out with a bunch of guy friends. I try to implement now what I hope for then. It does not mean that I do not have male friends, but the majority of my time is spent with my best friends that are all female.

Brenda: Are more of your girlfriends married or single? How do you find authentic friendships as a single woman?

Emma: Most of mine are still single. I find authentic friendships by really talking about life and faith. My best friends and I all walk daily together through the easy times and the hard times. We are rooted in Christ.

Brenda: Our perception of you is that you are living a fulfilled, purposeful life as a single woman. You’re not waiting around for marriage, but fulfilling God’s call on your life now. What would you say is your secret to doing this?

Emma: My secret for doing this is knowing that I have a purpose as an individual designed by God. I do not gain my identity the day I become an MRS. I gain a new last name, but Child of God will always be who I am. I am living each day for the glory of God. I try to maintain a mindset of eternity and marriage is a gift from the Lord, but it is never going to fulfill me as much as my Savior Jesus does.

Brenda: What words of advice do you have for other single women who want to live with purpose now and not wait for marriage to start their lives?

Emma: Act! Stop thinking about it so much, and just live. Spend time daily with the Lord reading His Word and examine your gifts and talents. We all have a calling and a purpose. What is yours? Listen for the call of God and follow Him wherever He asks because it is all about Him. It is also so sweet that we can find joy in serving Him with what He has entrusted to us as on earth!

Brenda: And some fun stuff!

Brenda: Which do you like best – Facebook or Twitter or Instagram or Pinterest (or all of it!)?

Emma: Facebook

Brenda: What’s your favorite drink?

Emma: I am a water girl. I do enjoy the occasional Coke Icee though!

Brenda: Where would you want to live the rest of your life – beach or mountains?

Emma: Beach

Brenda: Do you read more fiction or nonfiction?

Emma: Nonfiction

Brenda: Are you an introvert or extrovert?

Emma: Extrovert

Brenda: What’s something quirky about you?

Emma: I am afraid of lemurs.

Brenda: What else do we need to know about you? Where can we connect with you online?

Emma: I am working on my next EP with Scott Williamson in Nashville, TN this spring 2015. If you are in the Hickory, NC area, please sign-up for the Polished Conference at my website. You can book me for church services, events, and concerts on my website as well! Check out my music videos and vlogs on Youtube! God Bless!