Brenda Rodgers

Category: surrender

  • Wholeness on Bended Knees

    Join me today for 5 Minute Friday with The Gypsy Mama where we write for five minutes on a given topic.  No editing. No criticism.  No worry.  Today’s topic is: Wholeness

    There are so many places we go in our quest for wholeness.

    In our homes we look around and say, “No, not here.  Only if I had something bigger.  Grander.  Something that would turn heads and create awe.”

    So we leave that place that was supposed to be a safe-haven of peace and go on our journey to find wholeness elsewhere.

    We stop at the place that pays us money.  Money to get the things our house lacks.  But in the back of our minds we think to ourselves, “No, this can’t be it.  Does this really matter?  Is this really making a difference?  Will this last?”

    So on we go to the next thing along the road.  The road’s getting long now, and the hills are getting high.  Maybe this is where it is.  Maybe this object, substance, person, mindset is where my wholeness will be found.  Except that they are really idols.  And no, I know, only temporarily will I find wholeness here.

    So back I go to my original place and in that house that isn’t quite right I bend my knees until they touch the ground.  I cry out, cry out begging for something that will last, that will never change or go away.

    And there it is: Wholeness – wrapped around the words to my Savior.

  • Remembering: Hold Me Up for Miracle #1 – Day 16

    This week we remember John’s road to a  heart transplant.  I wrote this on this day last year. This is the day he was put on life support and we received our first miracle of surviving that surgery.

    Photo Credit

    I walked into my biggest fear this morning.

    John’s staph infection caused another Arrhythmia, but this time one that he could not come out of. His blood pressure was dropping and his temperature was rising. When I got to John’s room, the doctors were already convening to decide what to do. His weak heart could not fight this infection. We were losing John.

    The doctors decided to put John on a form of life support called ECMO (Extracorporeal Membrane Oxygenation). This would allow his body to rest so that the antibiotics could fight his infection. However, being put on ECMO required a surgery, and one that was risky because John was so weak.

    As soon as I got the the waiting room, I began to send texts, messages, and posts begging for prayer. I sat there numb as I cried out to God in my head and read Psalms.

    I said to God that I know His will is perfect. I know that He will sustain me no matter what happens. I know that John is His. But I also told God that I really want John here with me. I begged Him in that hour to save John’s life because I would miss him too much if I lost him. I told Him that I needed John in my life.

    The hour was long and grueling.

    Finally, John’s surgeon came into the waiting room and sat down beside me. It was like, in that moment, all life in the room was still. All breath was gone. The air was stagnant. I felt suspended with nothing below to catch me if I fell. God was holding me up.

    The doctor proceeded to tell me that John was now on life support. The surgery to get him connected to it went o.k. However, he emphasized that John was very, very sick. ECMO was a very short term solution. John had to get a heart in 4-5 days. The fact that John survived this surgery is a miracle from God because he was not expected to survive it.

    About an hour later, I went to see John. At the end of his bed was a huge machine. There was a perfusionist who’s job was to sit there and control the ECMO machine. It looked like a simple job, but from what I understand it is very complicated and highly skilled.

    I rubbed John’s hair like I do at home. I told the nurse’s he knows when I’m here because he feels me rubbing his head. I talked to him and told him how much I love him. I asked him to keep fighting for me and for him. I prayed with him. I held back my tears, and if I had to cry I walked outside the room for a second. I don’t want John to be scared or worried.

    So now I am praying for John to get a heart this weekend. He still has to clear his infection before he can be transplanted, so by this weekend he should be ready. I am still very sensitive to all that this entails and what I am really asking, but I know that God has an ultimate plan that has been in place for a long time. I just pray that one of the hearts that become available matches John. I never thought that John may not make it in time. I have heard countless stories of people who run out of time before they get a heart. But I never thought that would be John.

    Through it all I know that God is in control. I did not know this road that we would take, but He always did.

  • Guest Posting on (In)Courage Today!!

    

    Photo Credit

    Does your heart ache for someone you love to know Jesus that way you do?  To experience His love, His peace, His joy? 
    Do you feel like you are constantly pulling them along, like on a leash, begging them to just catch up? 

    I am so excited to be guest posting today over at (In)Courage where I share my thoughts on my recent struggle with A Heart on a Leash!

  • How to Look Out for Footholds

    I try to keep his feet out. Well, I try to keep all of him out but especially his feet. His feet are what he uses to get in. His foothold is the prerequisite to the rest of him. When he’s in and and his feet are firmly planted he becomes something stronger. He becomes a stronghold.

    How do we keep Satan from creating a stronghold in our lives?  It starts with keeping his feet out.

    In 1 Corinthians Paul wrote to the Christians in Corinth, and he said, ” ‘I have the right to do anything,’ you say—but not everything is beneficial. ‘I have the right to do anything’—but I will not be mastered by anything” (1 Corinthians 6:12 NIV).

    Some Christians, after understanding that they were saved by grace and not works, thought that they could do anything they wanted. However, Paul quickly rebukes this thinking by explaining that just because something might be sinless doesn’t mean that it is beneficial. Why? Because it may cause a foothold.

    So what? So it causes a foothold. What’s the big deal in that? Paul goes on to say that we are not to be mastered by anything. The foothold makes the stronghold possible.  The stronghold is the master. We become the slaves.

    Let’s play this out with a common and legitimate example.

    On Monday I drink a glass of wine. That is fine. It is not a sin to drink a glass of wine. So I have a glass of wine.
    On Tuesday I drink a glass of wine. That is fine. It is not a sin to drink a glass of wine. It is not a sin to drink a glass of wine two days in a row. So I have a glass of wine.
    On Wednesday I drink a glass of wine. That is fine. It is not a sin to drink a glass of wine. It is not a sin to drink a glass of wine three days in a row. So I have a glass of wine.
    On Thursday I drink a glass of wine. That is fine. It is not a sin to drink a glass of wine. It is not a sin to drink a glass of wine four days in a row. So I have a glass of wine.
    On Friday I drink a glass of wine. That is fine. It is not a sin to drink a glass of wine. It is not a sin to drink a glass of wine five days in a row. So I have a glass of wine.

    A month later I realize I have had a glass of wine every day for the past month. I like the wine, and I realize I look forward to it. I plan for it. I rearrange my schedule to get it. I get irritated when I can’t have it.

    Now I have a new master, and I am slave.

    The days were footholds that in time turned into something stronger – a stronghold – that no longer just has a foot in my life, but has its whole body it my life.

    How do I look out for footholds in my life?

    1. I “pray without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17 NASB). Throughout the day I am talking to God even about the most minor and seemingly unimportant things. Why? Because the smart comment I made to my husband could lead to something stronger. The anger I felt towards the cashier could lead to something stronger. The jealousy I have about my friend’s blessings could lead to something stronger.

    2. I ask God to show me my weaknesses (Psalm 139:23-24 NIV). There are things that I struggle with that other people may not.  They have their own struggles.  So for me it is best that I not be involved in situations that will perpetuate those struggles even though they might be quite all right for someone else. I ask God to search my heart and show me where I need to be careful.

    3. I monitor my desire to “sit at His feet” (Luke 10:38-40 NIV). Sometimes I don’t feel like praying. I don’t feel like reading my Bible. I don’t feel like doing my Bible study. This is when I try to perk up and pay attention because I know I am highly vulnerable. I try to be very intentional with the time I spend with Jesus.

    “and do not give the devil a foothold” Ephesians 4:27 (NIV)

    How do you look out for footholds in your life so that they don’t turn into strongholds?

  • God, What is Your Assignment for Me Today?

    Yesterday I followed a bit of advice from someone I do not know, but who seems very wise, Lysa TerKeurst, the author of several books including Made to Crave and the president of Proverbs 31 Ministries.

    The question to her on Twitter was, “What is your advice for a woman starting a ministry?”

    Lysa responded, “Ask God for your assignment each day and start with what’s in front of you.”

    Since Lysa has started a ministry before I am thinking this is great advice! So as I sat in the big, fluffy chair where I meet God each morning I said to Him, “God, today I am asking you to please give me my assignment for today”, in a sweet, sing-song voice as if His assignment was going to be one in which I could just sing my way through, check off my list, and go to bed feeling like a better person.

    I didn’t think any more about it.

    About an hour later I went to the computer and opened my email expecting to see the same old things I get every morning – a few emails from friends, Facebook notifications, newsletter subscriptions, etc. – and there it was. My assignment from God.

    Suddenly my arms got heavy feeling like they were dragging the floor. Nerves welled up inside me causing me to shake. Fear overcame me.

    God, I didn’t mean this! This? I can’t handle this! I’m not good enough for this! What are You thinking?

    I was almost paralyzed.

    After God got a hold of my mind, I realized, “Did I really think asking God for an assignment would be anything that I could handle on my own?”

    A popular saying is “God never gives us more than we can handle”. We assume this is in the Bible because we say it so much and hear it so often. In actuality this statement is not in the Bible. The verse that this statement tries to emulate is “He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure” (1 Corinthians 10:13). So in regards to temptation, yes, God does not give us more than we can stand, and He always shows us a way out.

    But I wasn’t being tempted. I was faced with a task that I did not feel adequate enough to handle. God does give us tasks that we cannot accomplish on our own, especially when we pray bold prayers and ask for them.

    Why does He do this?

    The very next thing I did yesterday morning, after God got a hold of my mind, is I prayed. I went to God and told Him that I am not wise enough, strong enough, spiritual enough to handle the assignment He had given me. Then I asked Him to please work through me, use me, be my hands, give me my words, so that His purpose could be accomplished.

    If I was able to accomplish this on my own, then I would have no need to turn to God. I would carry out the actions that I thought needed to be done, and I would receive the credit, ultimately putting myself higher than God. See, God’s tasks require the supernatural – supernatural wisdom, supernatural strength, supernatural patience, supernatural endurance.

    Then when I’m asked questions such as:

    “How are you so strong?”
    My answer is: “I’m not. God is.”

    “How do know that?”
    My answer is: “I don’t. God does.”

    “How do you get through this?”
    My answer is: “I can’t. God can.”

    God gives us more than we can handle so that He can show us His power, His sovereignty, His grace, and His love through us. We see His majesty, and we have faith that He is who He says He is and that He does what He says He is going to do.

    “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

    What do you do when you feel like an assignment from God is too much for you to handle?

  • Independence – Without Strings

    One of God’s greatest gifts is the gift of choice – the gift of freedom – that He gave us from the beginning.

    “The Lord God placed the man in the Garden of Eden to tend and watch over it. But the Lord God warned him, “You may freely eat the fruit of every tree in the garden—except the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. If you eat its fruit, you are sure to die.” Genesis 2:15-17 (NLT)

    Even Jesus was given the gift of freedom.

    “The reason my Father loves me is that I lay down my life—only to take it up again. No one takes it from me, but I lay it down of my own accord. I have authority to lay it down and authority to take it up again. This command I received from my Father.” John 10:17-18 (NIV)

    Although the capability of every choice I make ultimately comes down to God’s provision, sometimes my choices give God more opportunity to show His blessing upon me.

    “Now listen! Today I am giving you a choice between life and death, between prosperity and disaster. For I command you this day to love the Lord your God and to keep his commands, decrees, and regulations by walking in his ways. If you do this, you will live and multiply, and the Lord your God will bless you and the land you are about to enter and occupy.” Deuteronomy 30:15-16 (NLT)

    Except for the blessing of living in the United States of America. This blessing has nothing to do with my choices.

    It is by pure grace and mercy upon me that God chose for me to be born here – here – in America – the Land of the Free – the Home of the Brave – here.

    Right now I could be one of these little girls in India enslaved and forced into the sex trafficking trade (As Our Own). I could be one of these children in Africa or Guatemala or Indonesia who live in poverty (Compassion). Or I could be a woman in Burkina Faso, the third poorest country in the world, with no clean water to drink (Engage Burkina).

    But no. God blessed me with The United States. A place where I can live in peace. A place where I am treated with human worth. A place where I can dream without seemingly impossible obstacles to overcome first. A place where God’s original gift of freedom is realized.

    There is nothing I did or do to deserve it. It is the blessing of Independence with no strings attached to me – just to God.

    Thank you, God, for the blessing of this country, The United States of America, and for every man, woman, and child who went before me to give me my freedom, and for every man, woman, and child who right now is sacrificing their peace, their security, and their families for me. I know that “When someone has been given much, much will be required in return; and when someone has been entrusted with much, even more will be required (Luke 12:48). Please help me, O Lord, to never take for grated this country or my independence. Help me to use your blessing to your glory. Amen.