Category: Marriage

  • Genesis 50:20

    “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.”
    Genesis 50:20

    Today I heard the story of Joseph again, and God taught me something new from it in light of the present bondage we feel with John’s sickness.

    Joseph continued to have misfortune throughout his life. First he was sold into slavery by his brothers. Then he was thrown into jail for a crime he did not commit. He remained righteous before God by doing the right thing, but was still punished for it. Joseph, however, continued to see God’s goodness through it all. He never turned his back on God. When Pharaoh had a dream that needed interpreted and heard that Joseph could interpret dreams, he sent for Joseph who was in prison. Pharaoh asked him to interpret the dream for him, and Joseph responded, “I cannot do it, but God will give Pharaoh the answer he desires.” Genesis 41:16

    When Joseph was a teenager he had a dream from God that God would make him into a leader and his family would bow down to him. He interpreted the dream to mean that others would serve him. However, as his life unfolded he came to realize that he had not understood the dream correctly. God was stripping him of everything – all of his pride and self-reliance – to make him into a servant for others. He served while he was in prison and he served when the famine hit Egypt and Canaan. He thought others would serve him, but instead God was making him into what he needed to be so that he could use Joseph to serve others and ultimately to begin to prepare the way for the nation of Israel. “But God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance.” Genesis 45:7

    This story is a reminder to me that God is in complete control and that this experience is a part of his marvelous plan. From the world’s view it looks like our lives are hopeless. But if we continue to see God’s goodness and remain faithful to Him through this trial, He will use it for what it’s intended for. We don’t know exactly what that is right now, but in time God will reveal it to us more clearly. We are being brought into the deep valley so that God can raise us up into what He has truly called us to be and what His ultimate plan is for our lives. God had huge plans for Joseph, but He knew that Joseph could not serve Him the way He intended without bringing him into complete reliance on Him.

    Throughout the Bible, God has always been faithful to deliver His people after a period of bondage. John and I are awaiting our deliverance from the bondage of sickness that is plaguing our lives, and we know that God will come through for us. And when we are on the other side, we will be more of what He has intended us to be and able so serve Him more faithfully.

    “for your love for me is very great. You have rescued me from the depths of death.” Psalm 86:13

  • Justin John: A Legacy of Faith and Determination

    Tonight John was reading a Georgia magazine. He was really quiet and intense as he read. I looked at him and kind of chuckled because John’s not a “reader” in the sense that he doesn’t like to read books, but he sure was into that magazine about the Bulldogs. He said to me, “This is speaking right to me, and I’m serious.” After he finished reading it he handed it to me. By the end of me reading it I was crying.

    This is a perfect example of the hope we have in the Lord when we face trials. This young man, Justin John, saw his life through the eyes of the Lord, and he surrendered to that life God had given him with the understanding that it was for one purpose and one purpose only – to glorify Him. Through glorifying his Father, others saw Jesus through Justin John. And others came to know Him.

    It is hard to wrap our minds around the fact that God is not primarily concerned with our happiness. He is primarily concerned with our relationship with Him. Because He loves us so much He doesn’t keep us in our perfect, painless, lives full of gratification and happiness. Instead He takes us far away from them so that we can grow, become stronger, and transform into the disciples He has called us to be. God knows the perfect way to do that, and sometimes it comes in a form of unrelentless emotional and physical pain. Our hope is not in the things of this world, but in our eternal life in heaven. Because I am righteous, I will see you. When I awake, I will see you face to face and be satisfied.” Psalm 17:15 “Whom have I in heaven but you? I desire you more than anything on earth.” Psalm 73:25 Justin John understood this truth and lived it so that others could learn it too.

    Tonight is a hard night for John. He is tired, uncomfortable, and in some pain. I thank God for speaking him tonight through this story. My prayer is that we can see our lives and our situation like Justin John saw his – through the eyes of Christ – and that He will constantly be glorified through it. I pray that people will hear our story, experience it with us, and come to know their Heavenly Father who loves them so much and is just reaching out for them to come to Him.

    I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection from the dead.” Philippians 3:10-11

    Justin John: A Legacy of Faith and Determination


    Former Georgia linebacker Rennie Curran, who was a third-round pick of the Tennessee Titans in 2010, wore a “PUSH” bracelet after meeting Justin in 2009. (Icon SMI)

    By Lyn Scarbrough

    Justin John’s leg had been giving him trouble.

    “He had pain after workouts,” recalled Stephen John, a sports ticket marketer whose 17-year old son was looking forward to his high school senior basketball season. “We thought it was growing pains, so we bought a knee brace.”
    Justin, an all-state baseball player, was also a mentor on Wednesday evenings at Hebron Baptist Church in Dacula, Ga. On a September night in 2005, a simple collision there changed everything for the John family.
    “A sixth grade kid ran into Justin’s knee,” Stephen said. “The pain was so bad, Justin cried. He said, ‘I tore my knee.’ The next day he had X-rays and they showed a spot. Two days later, we saw an orthopedic surgeon.”
    Results were much worse than growing pains or a torn knee.
    It was osteosarcoma — a malignant bone tumor, which occurs most often in young people. About 400 children in the United
    States are affected each year, with more than half knee-related.
    Treatment started quickly. First, 12 rounds of chemotherapy shrunk the tumor. Then, during the Christmas holiday season, surgery removed it.
    “The doctors thought they got it all, but they wanted to do more,” explained Jane John, mother of Justin and his two siblings, Andrew and Megan. “They got the tumor itself, but it was not totally dead. So, they ordered 18 more rounds of chemo.”
    People who knew Justin were not surprised at his reaction.
    “His attitude was top notch,” Stephen said. “For the first nine months, he was on crutches. They wanted him to use a wheelchair, but he wouldn’t do it.”
    A year passed and tests were cancer free. Doctors were able to take out the port that had carried Justin’s chemo medicine.
    “We thought we beat it,” Jane remembered. But, a month later, the cancer was found in both of his lungs. The next two years saw seven surgeries, more chemotherapy, and meetings with specialists.
    Dr. Thomas Olson, an oncologist at AFLAC Cancer Center at Egleston Hospital in Atlanta was one of Justin’s primary physicians. He received a call from Fox 5 Television.
    “They wanted to follow somebody through the cancer experience,” Jane said. “Dr. Olson told them, ‘I have the perfect person, Justin John.’ The series was titled, ‘Justin’s Journey.’
    “Little children would see Justin and say, ‘I know you. I saw you on TV.’”
    One incident sticks out to Stephen and Jane.
    “A cameraman was upset that Justin quoted Scripture during the segment and said that his disease happened for a reason,”
    Stephen recalled. “He told Justin, ‘You have cancer. Give one good reason for that.’ Justin gave a quick answer — ‘I can get on national television and tell about my faith. You can’t go wrong by trusting God.’”
    In addition to God and family, Justin had several other passions. Two of the biggest were sports and his beloved Georgia Bulldogs.
    “Justin started playing tee-ball at 5-years old,” Stephen said. “The first thing that he said after ‘Momma’ and ‘Daddy’ was ‘Go Dawgs!’”
    As he grew older, he became an avid Georgia fan, decorating his room to look like Bulldog headquarters.
    Georgia head football coach Mark Richt found out about Justin’s cancer during early treatment and sent personal letters.
    “I just want you to try to stay focused on the end result,” Richt said in one of the letters. “Just remember that going through this will only make you a stronger and a more mature man, but you will need to rely on the Lord, your family and your friends to help you through it.”
    Despite the pain and the disappointments, there could not have been a better role model than Justin. But, late in 2009, doctors gave bad news to the John family. There was nothing else that could be done medically. Justin’s fight couldn’t last much longer.
    Christian friends from Hebron Baptist were there.
    “They were there 24 hours a day,” Jane said. “They brought meals every day for three months. Close friends, pastors could call any time. Justin would wake up during the night in pain and ask us to call close friends right then for prayer.”
    Two Georgia football players provided special support. Linebacker Rennie Curran visited Justin at home before the Independence Bowl game with Texas A&M.
    “Meeting Justin was a great experience,” Curran said. “He was so positive and told me how much he loved the Bulldogs. We laughed and enjoyed the time together.”
    Justin gave Curran one of his “PUSH” bracelets, standing for “Pray Until Something Happens.” Curran wore the bracelet during the game, but made another promise.
    “I told him that when I made my first big play, I would give a sign on television to let him know that I was thinking about him,” he said. “On about the third play, their wide receiver caught a short pass and I blasted him and threw up the sign.”
    The John family was watching, saw Curran wearing the bracelet and saw the sign.
    “The family told me they saw it and were in tears,” Curran said. “I’ve kept wearing the bracelet every day since the game.”
    Another Bulldog, former quarterback David Greene, visited in early January.
    “The thing that amazed me most was how strong and spirited he seemed to be,” he recalled. “I expected to see a frail and
    exhausted kid, but during two hours there, I almost forgot that he was sick.
    “A kid this young and full of life taken over by cancer is hard to accept. It’s important to lean on scriptures like Proverbs 3:5-6.”
    Justin John died on February 19, 2010, a little over three weeks after his 22nd birthday. The funeral drew over 3,500 people to visitation that lasted from 6 p.m. until midnight.
    “At the service, a young man came up to me crying,” Stephen said. “He asked if I was Justin’s father. He told me that he had become a Christian due to Justin’s example and that he was being baptized the next Sunday.”
    That would have brought joy to Justin, who had chosen those verses in Proverbs as his watchword:
    “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.” Proverbs 3:5
  • A Loving Surprise

    The week we came home from the hospital, I went back to work on Thursday. John, of course, didn’t go back until Monday. When I came home that day, I walked in to a wonderful surprise for “being such a trooper” for seven days in the hospital. John was overwhelmed with surprise and gratefulness that I stayed with him in his room the whole time. I don’t really know why because it wasn’t an option. I never would have left him.

    He went out that day and bought me a dozen pink roses, some of my favorite candy – orange slices and black licorice, – and a gift certificate for a facial AND a massage for 90 minutes!! It was a huge surprise, and made me feel so loved and special. What made it even more special is that he went to three different stores looking for peanuts candy. He couldn’t find it, but got what I like just as much. I’m going to use the gift certificate when I get out of work, and I can’t wait!

    I love you, John! Thank you for loving me so much!

  • This Week’s Praises and Prayers

    Thank you, Lord, for these things this week:

    1. our time with Will, Jamie, Georgia, Rod, and Jensen
    2. a three day weekend for rest
    3. John’s heart continuing to sustain him and give him energy
    4. John’s ability to walk around yesterday at Old Salem

    Lord, please hear and answer these prayers:

    1. John’s heart continues to give him energy and strength
    2. that God will protect our emotions and feelings and keep us from depression and sadness
    3. for John’s new heart to come in God’s timing – of the hearts that become available in the coming months that one will be a perfect match for John
    4. for John’s heart donor – for his salvation – for John’s heart donor’s family – for peace, love, strength, and comfort now and in the months to come
    5. for John’s upcoming surgery to have no complications and that his body does not reject his new heart
    6. that John has many, many more years here on earth to learn more about You and glorify You
    7. that we will continue to see God’s hand in all of this and glorify Him

  • A Hope that is Never Ceasing – Today Show: Bionic bride ‘normal’ after heart pump saves her life

    Throughout this past month, since we found out that John will have to have the transplant, I have been overwhelmed with thankfulness for God allowing us to experience “the peace that surpassing all understanding” (Philippians 4:7) on a daily basis. Each day brings us new hope.

    Today our hope came in a video clip of The Today Show. It was on the Children’s Cardiomyopathy Foundation’s page, http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/Childrens-Cardiomyopathy-Foundation/75335952379?ref=ts, and it is the story of a young lady who was diagnosed with Cardiomyopathy. Her story is very similar to John’s, and the hope she is now seeing transpire in her life is a reflection of our hope – our hope for life, our hope for a fulfilling life, our hope for a family.

    She has a ventricular assist device (a heart pump) that is on the outside of her body and pumps her heart for her. This is an option for John if he needs it. It is a major surgery, and as is discussed in the video, can have some complications. John’s doctors do not want him to undergo two major surgeries in one year if he can hold off. That is why he in on the IV medication for right now. John’s doctor told me, “I know I can keep him alive until the transplant.” I’m holding him to that, and I’m so thankful for options in his treatment. It makes me think of how wonderful it is to live in this time in history with all of the medical technology. Before now our options would not be so promising.

    This video is our hope for today. Thank you, God, for every hopeful thought, experience, and story you give us.

    Click below to watch the video.

    Today Show: Bionic bride ‘normal’ after heart pump saves her life

  • A Love Story Made for the Movies

    I’ll never know the purpose behind the events in my life – why God allowed things to happen the way they did – until I get to heaven, but from my extremely finite view of my life I like to speculate the reasons.

    If you asked when I was a little girl what I wanted to be when I grew up I would have told you most definitely “a mommy”. That was really all I cared to be. But somewhere along the way I realized that mommies don’t make money. Plus I couldn’t major in homemaking in college. So my thoughts went like this, “What job can I have and be at home with my kids the most – that is if I had to work a job for money?” So I majored in education and became a teacher. I honestly did not think I would teach for forever. I thought I would have several children – three or four – and be a full-time homemaker the rest of my life.

    Boy did God have other plans!

    For years I asked God every day to bring me the man He chooses for me, but He never did, and in the meantime He protected me from several people who definitely weren’t who He wanted me to marry. After several years of not meeting John – the person God had chosen for me – I came to the place of peace that maybe God did not intend for me to be married. I still wanted to get married, but I began to think of all the things I could do and be without being married. It took a long time of surrendering through different events in my life, but I finally had gotten to a place where it was o.k.

    I began to see through the eyes of the Holy Spirit that God does love me, and He knows what is best for me always. Due to my free will, I could have demanded my “right” to be married and married someone I wasn’t sure was the one God had chosen for me. I could have gotten angry at God and insisted that His ways were not always right and that I was not going to follow Him until He did what I wanted. But all of that would have just taken me down a dark, lonely road with a long detour to where I ultimately needed to end up, and would most likely end up again, in His arms. So after many years of kicking and screaming – I surrendered.

    Shortly after that John came along.

    John and I met on Match.com. Now I know tons of people who met this way, but three years ago that wasn’t the case. John contacted me on a Sunday, and we met the following Friday. That was July 13 – one day after my birthday. One cardinal rule of Match dating is that you never, ever, ever let someone pick you up for a date because you just don’t know them. I wasn’t on Match for long before I met John, but the few dates I did go on I followed this rule without thinking otherwise. I had two “rules” for myself on Match: I was very selective with who I chose to spend my time with and I was very cautious.

    With John I was still very selective. My first response to him after he contacted me was, “Are you a Christian?” I figured that if this scares someone off, then they’re certainly not the person for me, so I just put it out there. John’s response was, “Yes, but I like beer.” I laughed and said, “Well, since drinking beer (or not) isn’t a qualification for being a Christian, then I guess we’re o.k.”

    However, I didn’t follow my second rule with John. I don’t know why, and I would never recommend it to anyone because it is a very dangerous thing to do. I just remember John saying that he’d pick me up, and I said o.k. without ever thinking, which is very much unlike me. When I told my friends about the fact that he was picking me up they were immediately concerned. I went back to John and told him their concerns, and he said, “Well, when I get there if you don’t feel comfortable I’ll leave.” Really that still shouldn’t have made a difference, but nonetheless he came to pick me up. Not to overspiritualize it, but personally I think this was God giving me peace that it was o.k. because He knew the plan. However, I still would not advise anyone to ever do this themselves!

    John came from work in his little, red Ford Ranger decked out with Georgia Bulldog stickers, floor mats, steering wheel cover, and drink holder decorations. It was over-the-top, but it was John. He was wearing a pair of khaki pants and a hot pink and blue striped Polo shirt. When I opened the door and saw him standing there for the first time, he was holding one dozen pink roses. He knew that pink was my favorite color. I can still see him in my head like it was yesterday. He said the roses were for my birthday the day before and for our first date.

     

    That night he took me to a Mexican restaurant for dinner. Again, I asked him if I could pray over our food. Again I figured that if he got scared away, then he wasn’t the one. After dinner we watched The Notebook because I told him that no guy would ever watch it with me.

     Eleven months later we were married.

    People who haven’t known me long, but know that John and I haven’t been married long, have asked me recently if I knew John had this disease when I met him. I know what they are really asking. How did I make the decision to continue the relationship? Was it hard to fall in love with him? Was I scared? John told me on our second date about his diagnosis with Cardiomyopathy. I can’t say that I was scared. I thought about it, but only for a minute. Looking back on it I really feel like God was protecting me from knowing all the details so that I wouldn’t be scared. Back then John seemed fairly healthy and “normal”. He has always taken a lot of medications, and I knew he could run marathons or anything, but most people can’t. Cardiomyopathy never interfered in our life in those early days.

    In the spring before our wedding date in June, John’s company decided to consolidate all of their offices to their corporate headquarters in Chicago. If you know anything about John and me the last place we’d want to live is Chicago. It’s a great place to visit, but for us not to live. This was when the economy was at the beginning of getting worse and people were losing jobs and not being able to find new jobs pretty much all over the country. The housing market was also down.

    So here we were, three months from getting married, and we both had to find new jobs (I was moving from Atlanta to Winder where John lived). Strangely enough, though not for God because He was orchestrating this whole thing, John found a job in Greensboro, North Carolina in the same industry he had been in for years. What? Relocate to another state when we are just about to get married, and Georgia is where everyone we know in the world lives? Well, we did what we had to do and what we felt led to do, and we decided to move. So now I had to find a job, and we had to buy a new house and hopefully sell our old house in a horrible housing market, all one month after our wedding. It was stressful.

    After a few months of the house in Georgia being on the market, after we both had jobs and were living in North Carolina, the house still wasn’t getting a lot of traffic to be sold. One night we were eating dinner, and we were talking about how concerned we were about the house selling when it occurred to me that we really hadn’t asked God to sell the house. I told John this, and we prayed and asked God to sell our house in Winder. The house sold two weeks later.

    Since then life has gone on like a typical life goes on. We have enjoyed our new home. I’ve enjoyed decorating it. However, we still miss our family and friends in Georgia and dream of moving back there one day. John has been fairly healthy until recently when we found out he needed the transplant.

    When we moved here we never thought about what hospitals were close by even though we’ve always known in the back of our minds that John may one day need a transplant. We thought briefly about leaving his doctors at Emory, but never discussed the hospitals.

    When John’s cardiologist in Greensboro referred him to see a doctor at Duke we immediately researched how Duke was ranked compared to Emory. We have a lot of respect for Emory, and it’s what we’re used to, so we wanted to see how Duke was ranked compared to Emory. Well Emory is ranked 13th in hospitals for heart transplants, and Duke is ranked 8th. Immediately we saw God’s hand.

    As I look back on the past three years of my life, the events seem to fit together like a perfectly planned puzzle. I can see God’s hand in each phase of it.

    John needed a wife, and I asked for a husband. God knew that John was going to need a heart transplant. He spared John’s life four years ago and allowed him to get better so he wouldn’t have to go through a transplant alone. I am confident that He chose me to be his helper through this process this time around. God answered my prayer by giving me John and allowing me the experience of the miracles that are taking place in our lives.

    And He led us to North Carolina, which is a very unlikely turn of events for a Georgia boy who eats, breathes, and sleeps Georgia, Georgia football, and everything southern. Now we see a glimpse of the purpose behind it all, even with the houses and jobs in a bad economy, because the have the opportunity to be at Duke.

    God, through His grace, has blessed us with this amazing love story that is all our own. It is precious to me, and it has made me rest in God’s perfect plan.