Brenda Rodgers

Category: Motherhood

  • The Miscarriage :: Another Chapter in My Story

    A month ago I stood in the hallway after church with an acquaintance friend. I knew she was expecting her second baby, so I asked her how she was feeling. As soon as the words left my mouth tears welled up in her eyes. A look of shock formed on her face.

    “We lost the baby,” she said in a soft, trembling voice.

    “But the first trimester was over, right?” I responded, confused that this really does happen after a woman crosses the safety line of three months.

    “Yes, I was twelve weeks.”

    My friend went on to share with me the details of afterwards, how difficult it had been, and how she didn’t understand because there were no complications in her first pregnancy.

    Tears came to my eyes as I tried to express my sorrow for her loss. I kept it a secret that I, too, was pregnant. Five weeks to be exact. And privately fear took root in my own joy.

    The next Sunday I sat in the sanctuary and glanced to my right. There, at the end of the row, sat my friend. I just looked at her and silently prayed for God to comfort her. Then I begged Him to spare me the loss of my child. Tears came to my eyes at the thought. I dismissed them. Surely that wouldn’t happen to me, too.

    Miscarriage -- Another Chapter in My Story (more…)

  • Why I’m Announcing My Pregnancy at 5 Weeks

    ** An update to this post. I miscarried my baby at the end of November. You can read the whole story in this post “The Miscarriage :: Another Chapter in My Story”. Thank you for all of you who prayed for us during this time. God is good all the time. To Him be the glory. 

    ** This post might also be helpful – “How to Help Someone During a Miscarriage“.

    I thought this time would be different. During my first pregnancy, I was fearful of announcing my pregnancy too early, and then losing the baby. As I grappled with this feeling I wrote a guest post entitled “The New Rules for Announcing a Pregnancy“. But I still played it safe. Last week I looked back at my Facebook timeline, and I believe it was around week 10 that we announced it to the world. That’s probably fairly standard, I’m guessing. The heartbeat’s confirmed by then.

    Two weeks ago two lines on the little plastic stick showed up again. And right along with them so did the fear. This time maybe even more so. Now I know all that can go wrong. I have an insider’s view of how miraculous every little finger and every little toe truly is.

    So I contemplated. Maybe I should protect myself, follow the advice of those who have walked the path of losing a baby, and just keep it to myself for a while?

    But then there was another thought.

    Eternity is now set in my womb. For now and for forevermore I will be a mom to two babies, whether I ever lay eyes on one of them or not. I am a co-nurturer with God to bring bodily life into a soul that is already alive. A soul that has been in the mind of God before He created the first ever molecule of His creation (Jeremiah 1:5).

    I don’t think I’ve ever talked about it here, in this space, but those that know me really well know of my passion for the sanctity of life. I do not agree with abortion for any reason. I do not agree with artificial means for conception. I do not use the birth control pill. I do not agree with embryonic stem cell research. I do not agree with capital punishment.

    I do agree with embryo adoption.

    However, my fear did not support my conviction that life begins at the nanosecond of conception (Psalm 139:16).

    Sometimes when I’m afraid of something I’ll take myself down the path of what I fearful of. In this case I took myself down the path of losing my baby. Just typing those words makes me cry. What I found as I went down that mental scenario was the feeling of shame. If that happened, I would feel shame, like something is wrong with me. I’m not sure where the feeling of shame is coming from, and I need to delve more into it to see, but at the root of shame is the idea that I’m in control in some way. That I am the one who makes life and sustains life. But nothing could be further from the truth. God is sovereign. He is the One who makes life. He sustains life. I am only the vessel He uses to bring it forth.

    As I considered what might happen, I also thought about how painful it would be if I had to then tell people again and again, over and over, for weeks that I was no longer pregnant. Would I bust out in tears every time, in the same way I am right now with merely writing this post? How would I get through that pain? But there again, I remember, God is sovereign. God is sovereign in my joy and He is sovereign in my sorrow. He will equip me fully. I don’t have to give myself the words or hold myself up. He’s sufficient.

    I won’t try to protect myself, but I will honor the sanctity of life God has bestowed upon me. It’s not about me and my fears or feelings. It’s all about Him. His plan. His will. His desires. His sovereignty.

    And it’s about this baby.

    God has a purpose for my baby even now as he or she grows. Part of that purpose has already been revealed. To bring us joy. Our baby has already brought us so much joy in only a few short weeks. Our baby has excited our toddler girl. Our baby has caused us to fall a little harder to our knees in prayer to our Heavenly Father.

    So today I’m announcing to you that I am no longer a mom of one, but I am a mom of two. There is a new soul on this earth, and he or she is growing inside of me. We are filled with joy! The Lord has done great things for us!

    Why I'm Announcing My Pregnancy at 5 WeeksWe’re looking forward to July 2015!!

    Your prayers are beyond coveted and appreciated. Thank you!

    What today do you need to trust God with, without fear, by trusting in His sovereignty, and by holding onto the convictions He’s given you?

  • When I Thought Motherhood Would Bring Me Everything

    It’s no secret that all I ever wanted to do was be a wife and mother. I mean, so much that when my mom asked me at five-years-old what I wanted to be when I grew up, I told her “a mommy.” That never changed.

    When I Though Motherhood Would Bring Me Everything

    It took me a long time to get there, though. I did not get married right after college. And I did not have babies in my twenties. I was single for a long time. However, now I see a glimpse of why. Of course, I do not know God’s exact thoughts, nor will I ever until I see Him face-to-face, but I see that God was preparing me during my singleness for something He wants me to do now. That is write and mentor all of you – my readers who are single (and the ones who may want to mentor singles or disciple their daughters well). (more…)

  • An Interview with Jennifer Maggio from The Life of a Single Mom Ministries {Part 2}

    Yesterday was Part 1 of my interview with Jennifer Maggio, the founder of The Life of a Single Mom Ministries. Jennifer’s story is one of true redemption, so be sure to read Part 1 here. Today, we continue, and she tells us more about how she overcame great obstacles in her life and began her ministry.

    The Life of a Single Mom Interview Photo (more…)

  • An Interview with Jennifer Maggio from The Life of a Single Mom Ministries {Part 1}

    Sometimes I get emails from those of you who aren’t only single, but you’re also a mom. I want to tell you that I have so much respect for you. You are women who carry the parenting load of two people and seek to do so by honoring God fully with your lives. Being a single mom is the hardest subset of “singleness” and the hardest subset of “motherhood” by far.

    When I get your emails I want to speak truth-filled words of encouragement and hope to you. I want to tell you how much God loves you and how He has not forgotten you. However, even though my words are sincere, they still feel hollow because I have not experienced single motherhood.

    The Life of a Single Mom Interview Photo (more…)

  • What I Wanted from My Mom

    I became a mom about a year ago – to a baby girl – and as you can imagine thoughts of the kind of mom I wanted to be to my sweet daughter came rushing over me even when I was still pregnant. Hopes, dreams, expectations.

    And specifically what I want to give my baby girl that I maybe did not have.

    Today I’m at More to Be sharing with you “The One Thing I Wish I Had from My Mom”.

    Will you join me there? 

    More to Be Contributor